Nice Language Tiger
22 Mar 2010, written by Riz 0 Comments
Unless you dont have a TV (I dont), internet, or access to a news paper, then you must know that Tiger Woods is not the golden boy the world thought he was. His sexual escapades have been well documented and he recently just gave his first interview since checking himself into rehab…for sex. Thanks to the dudes at Deadspin, we got a chance to see some of Tigers text messages that he had been sending to his pornstar mistress Joslyn James. One bit of advice while reading these, imagine it as if Tiger himself is saying them. It will make them all that much better.
10. Tiger:Sent: 06:02 PM 10/01/2009:
Baby im not going anywhere or doing anything. You please me like no other has or ever will. I’m not losing that. You have to understand people love to talk about me. sometimes its good and sometimes its bad. I have learned to just roll with it no matter how much it upsets me when its not true. My life is a fish bowl
9. Tiger:Sent: 12:08 PM 10/04/2009:
Don’t F@#king talk to me. You almost just ruined my whole life. If my agent and these guys would have seen you there, Fuck
8. Tiger:Sent: 03:42 PM 09/08/2009:
Hurry so i come in that ass
7. Tiger:Sent: 05:26 PM 08/29/2009:
Next time i see you, you better beg and if you don’t do it right i will slap, spank, bite and fuck you till mercy
6. Tiger:Sent: 04:53 PM 08/29/2009:
I know you have tried every positing imaginable but what turns you on besides a dp
5. Tiger:Sent: 05:15 PM 08/29/2009:
I want you to beg for my c@#k. Kiss you all over to convince me to let you have it in your mouth
4. Tiger:Sent: 04:10 PM 08/29/2009:
Then im going to tell you to shut the F#%k up while i slap your face and pull your hair for making noise
3. Tiger:Sent: 04:08 PM 08/29/2009:
Hold you down while i choke you and F%$k that ass that i own
2. Tiger:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/29/2009:
Slap your face. Treat you like a dirty little whore. Put my c#@k in your ass and then shove it down your throat
1. Tiger:Sent: 01:28 PM 09/08/2009:
Have you ever had a golden shower done to you
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