Facebook: it’s a dangerous place. When Mark Zuckerberg wiped his ass with the privacy settings, thousands of people found themselves sharing things they never wanted to share. And with oversharing comes serious ownage. Here’s 10 of the most vicious Facebook ownings I’ve ever witnessed. (some we have posted here before, but for the good of the list they had to be included again.) Have a good weekend zooters PARTY ONNNNNN.

10 Balls of Steel
You have to have balls of steel to cap a guy on Facebook after banging his girlfriend. You can just see the steam shooting out of Mark’s ears at this.

9 Revoke her PETA membership
This girl set herself up so hard with this it’s not even funny.

(more…)

Back to the Future 2 is back on zootpatrol, and the awesomeness continues. Now is your chance to own the actual gear used by Marty McFly including the resizing jacket, the 2015 Nike Mag shoes, and the freakin actual Delorean, wow. www.profilesinhistory.com is a very well known auction website, that features authentic stuff from your favorite movies and t.v. shows, and this time they are auctioning off BTTF swag. If you are even thinking about taking one of these bad boys home, you better be bringing your check book because they aint going to be cheap. I really wish I could roll to Rucker Park and get into a pick up game rocking the Marty mcFly 2015 Nikes, then go on to getting dunked on, shit on, and thrown off the court.

Screen-used “resizing” 2015 jacket
Estimated Value: $25000 – $50000

Check all the other gear below.
(more…)

A lot of people know how to write a resume and talk their way into an interview. But when they get into the make or break dialogue, they stumble upon tough questions. Below, is some advice on approaching the tough questions that interviewers like to throw at job applicants and the answers you want to say vs the answers you should say.

Why did you leave your last job?
Real answer: It sucked balls, got paid like a 6th grade concession stand worker, and my boss was a douche.
What you should say: I felt my talents and abilities were underutilized.

What are your biggest weaknesses?
Real answer: I can’t concentrate for more than five minutes, hate all forms of authority and tend to fall asleep at my desk.
What you should say: I’m a workaholic. I just don’t know when to put down my work.

More interview questions and answers below
(more…)

Our friends over at the Oatmeal have done it again. This might be one of my favorite one’s they have done, just because of the accuracy of each ridiculous kind of photo people put up. If your a culprit of posting these kinds of photos found below, get it together immediately, please.

(more…)

1. You see a “60 Minutes” news team waiting in your office.

2. You turn on the news and they’re showing emergency routes out of the city.

3. Your twin sister forgot your birthday.

4. Your car horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell’s Angels on the freeway.

5. Your boss tells you not to bother to take off your coat.

(more…)

Zach sits down with Bruce Willis; one of the stars of the new movie Red, to talk about the 80s and some of the prestigious awards he has been awarded. “What you talkin bout Willis”.

An estimated 1.7 billion people live off the grid to varying degrees. In the United States, about 200,000 people live off the grid, which in this case means going without public utilities, without fossil fuels, or otherwise separate from The System. They make up for such abstentions through any combination of solar power, wind power, composting, smart architecture, makeshift shelter, gardening, farm animals, ingenious gadgets, and just generally being really, really persistent. Most of them seem to live in the Southwest (or the ones in the Southwest just have the biggest mouths.)

People go off-grid for various reasons. Not having to pay utility bills; reducing one’s carbon footprint etc. The 2007 documentary Off The Grid: Life on the Mesa shows a community of hippies, ne’er-do-wells, war veterans, drug addicts, rednecks, and teenage runaways living in relative obscurity in New Mexico. They generally live in cobbled-together shacks and abandoned automobiles. They have issues, but they make do by hook, crook, or .357 Magnum. Here is a preview of the documentary:

AMERICAAAAAA, FUCK YEAAA, que the Team America theme song. Being number 1 is always awesome, but not all the time, case in point.

So when you finally done with high school you get to leave one last quote to be cemented in the yearbook and time forever, a good chance to sound smart, motivated, and compassionate. Instead some people take that offer and really go balls to the wall and make a joke of it. I had a few friends myself that had some classic yearbook quotes from “Why do mice have shoulder blades, life is a mystery.” to “Ride or Die- DMX”, both from two of my best friends. Here are 15 classic quotes from the yearbook that are pretty hilarious.

Check the rest below.
(more…)