Valentine’s Day is this Sunday, which means that this week you’ll be on a quest for a gift that will get you laid without implying too much. The Valentine’s Day gift that you give your girlfriend says a lot about your relationship, and if you’re not careful your gift might send the wrong message. Here’s what her Valentine’s Day gift really says:
The Practical Gift:
What You Think It Says:
We’ve only been together for a short time, and I didn’t want to intimidate you by getting you something lavish and expensive, so instead I got you something that you can actually use a few times until it breaks!
What It Really Says:
We’ve only been dating for a month. There’s no way I’m gonna empty my bank account for your gift just yet. The item that you received from me was either a re-gift that I got from my weird cousin for Christmas, or it was right by the register at Walgreens, where I stopped to buy condoms on my way over to your place.
The Expensive Gift:
We have all heard the expression “Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer”. Well, apparently there is some truth to the expression. At this point everyone knows there are some real assholes on the internet, but sometimes those guys give us some comical material. Check out the questions and the answers in these photos, which are from Yahoo Answers.
I know the above is a Venn diagram but I couldn’t help to include in it. The rest of the included graphs are pretty hilarious, and even more funny because of how accurate and true they are. I think my favorite is the words that frighten youth today. When hearing there is no internet people act as if they just heard their mother died. They go into complete denial and do everything in their power to connect to a non existent server. People think without internet for 2 hours they are completely disconnected from reality and all the world’s most important news.
Teen Wolf masterbater in the bleachers
The weirdest thing here isn’t the fact that a high school basketball team snuck out a victory with a werewolf as MVP, but that some guy in the bleachers unzipped his pants to masturbate during the game. (Through the wonders of HD, this mistake has become even more obscene.)
I don’t know how it is still legal to ride a motorcycle without a helmet in some states. Granted if you get into a bad accident the chances of a helmet saving your life are pretty slim, but it defiantly helps. Is wearing a helmet really that uncomfortable, or do you just think not wearing a helmet is cool? Either way if your not wearing a helmet because it’s not in style maybe you should invest in one of these creative helmets to insure your life a little bit more while weaving in and out of traffic doing 200 miles per hour on a motorized bicycle.
10. Skull Helmet
9. Pac-Man Helmet
I don’t know about anyone else, but I could listen to Mike Tyson quotes all day long and they just get more hilarious each time. The former undisputed heavyweight champion of the world has a lot to say. Certainly one of the most quotable athletes in recent memory. Below you will find a small collection of motivational quotes to inspire, compel and educate. Live by these omens and you will be a successful and happy person in the future, we swear.
I know we rag on annoying and ridiculous Facebook users a lot, but this list of “How to Suck at Face” via the Oatmeal was too accurate not too share. Not to mention the simplistic art work that accompanies the info is pretty funny. Let’s just say we are trying to spread the word of people’s outrageous behavior on the book, to make it a better and safer place for all users, enjoy.
When I would get stumped on a test, or just flat out have no idea what the question even meant, I would usually leave it blank or just rewrite the question and then add fake equations hoping for partial credit. I always knew I would be getting a fat goose egg on it and wanted to give the teacher a right hook as I handed in my test. I wish I had the mentality of these clever students who instead of leaving their answers blank, came back with a clever “go screw yourself teacher” move. I applaud all these kids, creativity goes a long way, but in these cases mostly goes only as far as an F minus.
Now I have to admit I’m not a huge fan of playing beer pong anymore, but in college I was a straight shooter. My favorite part of beer pong was completely destroying everything on the table by superman diving across the room and throwing down a Charles Barkley dunk on the cups. The video below has to be an early entry into funniest videos of 2010. Every second of it reminds me of college and the dumb shit I used to do with my friends.