Women have a weird way of saying one thing and meaning something completely different, so I think it would be beneficial to give our readers a head sup, because if you are not careful you can think you are doing everything right, when in actuality you are in a shitstorm.
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2) Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4) Go Ahead
This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
5) Loud Sigh
This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot
and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6) That’s Okay
This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before
deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ . that will bring on a ‘whatever’).
8 ) Whatever
Is a woman’s way of saying F– YOU!
9) Don’t worry about it, I got it
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This
will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3.
Jenna Mourey, aka JennaMarbles who is hot and funny, almost extinct combo, is back again with another hilarious video. If you aren’t familiar with her, she is a writer for a division of barstool sports, and she is also the creator of the over 12 million viewed hit video, how to trick people into thinking you’re good looking. In this video she gives you a full proof way to end a conversation you have no interest in being in. Guy tries to talk to you at a bar, solved, bum stopping you for change and won’t leave you alone, solved. This move can work in virtually any situation and get that annoying asshole away from you and have you back to enjoying your day in no time. So get a pen and pad because Jenna is about to drop some knowledge on you.
Step 1: Do the exact opposite of everything Dom Mazzetti is about to tell you, or maybe follow his every word, I don’t know what ever gets you laid at the end of the night.
When you think of female bodybuilders, the word “revolting” immediately springs to mind. For years, men have been drawn to taught, fit women. However, things get dicey when the line moves from taught and fit to “works out until one looks like an androgynous sea creature.” Well, guess which camp the residents of this list fall into? These women are beautiful in their own way, which is a nice way of saying that they’re beautiful in no way at all. Some of these images COULD be Photoshopped. Dear Lord, I hope that some of these images have been Photoshopped. Otherwise…yuck. Here are twenty women who could stand to put down the weights and maybe just stick to power pilates.
The rest of the horrifying list below
If you’re planing to visit Amsterdam, one of the most beautiful and interesting cities in the world, there is one place that you shouldn’t allow yourself to miss – infamous Amsterdam Red Light District.
The whole low down on the amazing Red Light District below.
Women say a lot with their underwear. Unfortunately, they say a lot with their mouths, too. KIDDING! Back to the underpants. If you’re not familiar with women’s underwear, this guide is meant to help you out. All of us here at Zoot are total Casanova’s (and/or laundry thieves) so we were easily able to pool our weekend research and come up with a handy list of what a woman’s undergarments are trying to tell you. They’re listed in a kind of handy relationship timeline. Follow along closely, virgins.
Congratulations, you bagged a stripper. I’ve only ever seen a pair of these on a woman twice, and both times, I spent all my money. Chances are, when you take a woman home and she’s wearing a pair of these, she’ll tell you “I don’t normally do this”. She’s lying. Follow through, but be careful. If you’re nice to her, or just the right kind of mean, you’ll get to see her in a thong.
You’ve gone just beyond booty call and now you’re the most frequently dialed number in her phone after midnight. These say “Treat me like we’re in a cinemax movie.” These don’t get frequent play, because they look only slightly more comfortable than the aforementioned vagina-floss style panties.
Continue the panty timeline below
For a guy seeing two girls, or sometimes more than two girls, make out it is like winning the lottery combined with winning the super bowl. When a bunch of guys are drunk there is really nothing more they would rather see than two hot chicks make out, with seeing a fight coming in second place. Here is a hilarious collection of guys loving life, and photo bombing girls making out. Just look at the joy and happiness on these guy’s faces. So do your part ladies, make out with your friends next time you go out, put a smile on a guy’s face.
More great make out photobombs below
It’s that time of the year again: You’re prepping to spend way too much time with the kin, maybe traveling across country to see them, and stressing the hell out about getting non-repulsive gifts for your loved ones. And if you have a special lady friend in your life, you may also be doubting every swipe of your credit card (or cricket sound coming from your bank account). Because there’s already way too much pressure on you, here are some tips on what to avoid getting your girl for the holidays, along with some gift ideas that will surely induce hugs and, “You’re so sweet(s)!”
7 Workout Equipment
This one’s kind of a duh, as it’s an annual sitcom-husband screw up during every Christmas special. She’ll take it as a hint she’s fat, blah blah blah. No matter how much she talks about wanting those Shape Up shoes, don’t give in (they’re garbage, anyway). Exception: A super cute yoga mat if she’s a Pilates or yoga enthusiast. The ones at the gym are gross.
6 Any Kitchen-esque Gear
This category includes not only waffle makers and Day-Glo colored mixers, but also Fruit of the Month Clubs and bottles of liquor. (Unless you’re 16, a pint of liquor is not too thrilling, sorry.) Even if she’s a total foodie, anything falling into this realm is the opposite of personal. they may also interpret it as you telling them that you want cupcakes and quiches and they should be enthusiastic about making said snacks because the As Seen On TV-cupcake/quiche-making contraption is pink. Exception: A couples cooking class or out-of-the-ordinary fancy-schmancy dinner. they’ll also eat their faces off and get liquored up, it’ll just be not douche-y.
So you think you know this girl? You’ve met her friends, watched movies together, hung out and talked for hours. You’ve shown your sensitive side. Forget Facebook, her tweets, her diary, all her IMs. Forget music, her favorite movie, the books she’s read. They don’t mean dawk. The only truth is the almighty shot. Seek and you shall shoot.
On the surface she’s milky innocence, but something much more explosive lies just beneath. She has a bazooka strapped to her thigh, a Glock between her legs, a stiletto holstered at her waist. She’s a dangerous mountain road, slippery when wet.
more shots below
The success of “The Social Network” at the box office this past weekend has many mid-20-somethings nostalgically reminiscing back to the days of “The Facebook” (circa 2004), long before the advent of so-called “privacy settings.” It was a carefree time when users needed a .edu e-mail address from a select network of schools and coeds openly posted party pics without any sort of inclination that their drunken, underage photos would seen by a prospective employer or, worse, a curious aunt or parent. Six years, hundreds of millions of users, and billions of theoretical dollars later, Mark Zuckerberg’s online Frankenstein continues to be the most culturally relevant social network on the Internet. It also continues to be the ultimate online depository for women to upload photos of themselves. In turn, every warm-blooded man with a pulse and an Internet connection has squandered countless hours gawking at pictures of hot female friends — and friends of friends — on Facebook. So it seems girls need new tactics to keep themselves looking hot and to make sure perverts keep stalking their profile. Here are the top 10 tricks girls use to look hot on their facebook.
10. Posing for Group Photos with the Infamous “Angled-Knee Trick”
Facebook must have entire servers dedicated to storing photos that are a mirror image of the example above. When a group of girls huddle up to take a photo, the posture is almost universally the same: shoulders back, one knee slightly bent, and a foot forward at an angle. Points on the hotness scale skyrocket for showing some skin.
9. Posing for Group Photos with the Infamous “Strong-Arm Trick”
The so-called “Strong-Arm Trick” is pretty much a bastard cousin of the knee-out trick, as demonstrated above in the lake vacation photos of Oregon’s Cheerleading squad. It’s traditionally an optical illusion for tough girls (think rowers and field hockey players) to lose camera pounds in their arms. The basic protocol is a three-step process. First, the girl angles her body toward the camera. Second, she places her hands on her hip. Third, she pushes her funny bone back toward their shoulder so either (a) the muscle doesn’t bulge out or (b) flab on the front and back of her arm doesn’t jiggle when the photographer snaps the picture.